Over over

Can you ever forget when someone lies to you?
Is it possible to regain trust after feeling betrayed?
Why am I sensitive to stupid things?



I got a puppy awhile ago. Today I thought to myself, "She is truly what I needed to get over this rough stuff in life."  I love my dog a lot. She got hurt today. She's fine, but it was the most awful "scream" I have ever heard. I hope she never gets hurt again. She ran right for me but my mom swooped her up. She used to sleep in my room all the time but lately she likes only being downstairs. I wonder if maybe my dog doesn't really care for me. It's stupid and strange...but when you're always considering how loyal dogs are...and then yours doesn't even like you...it's really depressing !

I want to run away or die.

But it's scary to think about not existing anymore.
What's the point of any of this?


I wish my pup was my friend.
I wish I didn't feel so lousy all the time.

Sayo~nara~

I am saying goodbye to my dear friends the rats soon.
I have to be sad as much as I can before I actually do it.
I haven't been taking very good care of them lately, so it is about time I found them some good homes.

I remembered a humane animal shelter from my childhood and as it turns out they are still open.
Since they're humane I don't have to worry about them going to someone for snake food.
That makes me feel better.

Mostly I will miss Teruki and Dewey. Mostly Teruki.
All of the other rats could never make up their minds on if they wanted to be my friend or not.
Teruki was always the same.

I will miss them.
I hope someone new takes very good care of them.


I was listening to some person speak Japanese on a cd. He said "Sayonara~"...but he said it so beautifully, it was almost like a song. So I have to remember, when I feel like crying, that sometimes "sayonara" can be a beautiful thing.